R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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