is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize