i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
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The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
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asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I want a musical about memes.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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