jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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