I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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