Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
this hospital has no fireball
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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