If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
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Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
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when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out