I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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