there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
