I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
