My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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