Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
