I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We need a shit load of segways right now
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
