I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
