God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
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