he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
