That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
