Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
