i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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