just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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