I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
