She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
