Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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