I hate your face
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
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I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
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I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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