cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
