SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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