I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Randomize
