Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
not ubering you a puppy
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize