She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Randomize
