he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Randomize
