the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
