Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
