isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
All the doctor said was why
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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