Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
