I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
