So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
