I am puke
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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