OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
