i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
