Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
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