I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize