Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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