I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
