Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
she pinky promised me she was 18
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Randomize
