Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize