try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize