My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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