I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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