If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Randomize
