She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
