i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Randomize